Tag Archives: bad behaviour

Alcoholic Partner and Gossip

Sometimes we can become obsessed by other people’s problems and drama. By talking about it to others our own life problems seem trivial, ‘at least my life is not that bad.’ It also can give us comfort that other people’s lives are not perfect. We do this because we have a low opinion of ourselves. If you find yourself doing this stop and ask yourself and ask ‘what is going on with my life?’

When someone insults you, criticizes you or points out faults they believe you have, it can make you feel low and you can believe them. If someone tells you that you have two heads for long enough you could actually begin to believe it. If everyone you meet points out that you have two heads you should have a look in the mirror! What one person tells you may not be fact or correct, that is why it is important to reach out to others and explore the limiting beliefs one person has made you feel about yourself. By doing this we can shed these negative views we have of ourselves and start exploring the real us. When we have been treated with cruel words for years, it is easy for us to do the same to others. For a short period it can make us feel better about ourselves.

Other peoples limiting behavior does not mean we have to drop our standards. Learning to take responsibility does not only mean take responsibility for your actions but also your words. By changing this behavior you are forming another part of yourself that you can be proud of. This has a knock on effect because you start to feel good about yourself and people who feel genuinely good about themselves no longer feel the need to assault other people’s character, that includes our alcoholic partner.

Did you find this useful? If so sign up and get regular updates and support: Click here to join our ‘How To Live’ Group

Set Goals & Feel Good Again

Decide to take steps to feel good again. Remember feeling good? Relaxed? Not on edge? What you’ll find fascinating,  is your reactions to verbal abuse and disapointment change. It’s as if, the more you learn and concentrate on becoming the person YOU want to be, the less upset you’ll be about impending  bad behaviour, and it gets easier and easier to blow off. I came to the conclusion that I could have a satisfactory life without my alcoholic partner meeting any of my expectations and I stopped feeling the need to treat him badly or like a child anymore. By developing yourself and growing  stronger on the inside you will be more ready to decide to stay with him/her and you will no longer feel miserable as you will be in charge of your own life. Sit down with a pen and paper and make a list of all the things you want to achieve in life (EVERYTHING no matter how strange or unlikely!) Read it aloud once in the morning and once before you go to sleep at night. Concentrate on it. Without any other effort you will find subtle changes happening in your life which lead you to fulfil your goals. It works – try it!