For a short period I went through a stage of thinking of myself as a victim that these things were happening to me. It was only when I got a grip of myself and admitted that things don’t just happen to me – they were a result of me not taking action or continuing to repeat the same reactions that didn’t work. This was my comfort zone and it took a hell of a push for me to step out of it, in hindsight I shouldn’t have let it get to that stage.
Avoiding confrontation, keeping the peace or not approaching the issues when the person is sober incase you send them on a binge is not dealing with the situation. It is important to confront the situation, this takes courage, intelligence and planning. There is no point in opening a discussion about how you feel when someone has drink taken, you do have to find the perfect moment and when it arises you need to be ready. You need to be clear with your feelings and get them across quickly and calmly. You have to state the facts. It may take a few times to get the message through but by getting your message across, you are taking back control of your life and taking a decisive step forward.